YOU FAT S.O.B.

Believe it or not, this is a REAL quote from Rush Limbaugh:

"So Miss Fluke, and the rest of you Feminazis, here's the deal. If we are going to pay for your contraceptives, and thus pay for you to have sex. We want something for it. We want you post the videos online so we can all watch."

The fucking nerve of this guy. Rush, how about I pose a proposition for you? Since you have access to condoms at nearly every store in America, why don't you put on a frilly little number and hop on camera for us ladies, eh?

Oh, excuse me, I just vomited in my hand.

Your logic is like a god damn slice of swiss cheese. You don't want to pay for birth control, but you don't want abortions to be like... a thing, ya know?! You don't want to offer women reproductive control, but you're not really down with giving money to mothers who have to raise these children they never said they were ready for. It's all math, and apparently you fail that shit, New Coke style.

Perhaps us feeble gals should be chained to our ovens, released only for primping and sex - for procreation only, of course! Perhaps we should shut the fuck up while obese pricks like you ruin our country some more. Yeah, it would be okay watching the world burn as long as my lipstick were perfect.

This whole infringement on freedom of religion argument is bullshit. I don't even need to address it because it has even more fallacies than your convoluted, sexist rhetoric.

The next time you try to stick your penis in some unfortunate woman, remember, Rush: she surely must be a sex-taping slut because it's not like you're trying to get your rocks off or anything.

Oh, fuck it, you know what?! You're right. I'm a giant slutbag. Being in a loving, committed relationship, yet being smart enough to know we're not ready for kids is a sham. I really just want the birth control I eat by the handful to be free because I'm having SO MUCH SEX THAT I CAN'T AFFORD THE CONTRACEPTION!!!! Because you know, that's how prescriptions work...

You're right, ya old son-of-a-bitch. Couldn't possibly be that women want to have control over their bodies in the same way men do. That would just be foolish!

Ya dick.